.png)
It's Rosh Chodesh Elul✍️
- Aug 13
- 5 min read
It's Rosh Chodesh Elul, at long last.
These days there is a popular terms in the therapeutic world: Rupture and Repair. But, actually, rupture and repair is not a new therapeutic concept. It was created before the world itself.
Before Hashem created the world, He created Teshuvah. Hashem knew that an inherent part of life is rupture, so He built the power of repair into the design of creation.
We experience rupture and repair in all three of our primary relationships:
Our relationship with our parts inside ourselves. Our relationships with the people around us. And our relationship with Hashem.
All three will experience rupture. And all three thrive on the power of repair.
Nothing alive moves in a perfectly straight, flat line. The world was created with the movement of ratzo v’shov—moving forward and drawing back, coming close and pulling away, again and again.
A heartbeat that becomes a flat line is no longer alive.
Life has movement. Relationships have movement. Connection has movement.
Some say this is why we shukel when we daven. We move back and forth as we connect to Hashem—drawing close, pulling back, and drawing close once again.
Those of you who are blessed enough a deep and close relationship with Hashem know that there may also be times when you feel angry with Him. Times when you feel abandoned, betrayed, or deeply disappointed.
Nothing builds a relationship with Hashem like transparency. Being totally honest with yourself and sharing that with him. Telling Him about your pain, sharing your resentment, and facing your deepest wounds.
A real relationship requires honest connection. Nothing can be real, and nothing can develop and grow, if we cannot be real.
The same is true in our relationship with ourselves.
So often, we are afraid to face what we are really feeling. We carry deep grief, disappointment, and anger. So many times our feelings are so intense that we're scared of them. So, we have protector parts that work very hard to cover those intense feelings and keep us from coming too close to them.
But what if we gave ourselves permission to be with our true feelings?
What if we allowed ourselves to feel the force of the rupture, the depth of the pain, without running away from it?
That honesty could allow a much deeper repair to take place within us.
And, of course, the same is true in our relationships with the people around us.
Being transparent, open, and truthful, without being spiteful, can sometimes be painful. It may expose a rupture that we would rather ignore. It may bring discomfort or even resentment to the surface.
But it can also open the door to repair.
Only when we are honest about the rupture, the pain we are carrying, and the struggles we are going through can genuine repair begin.
This is why Teshuvah was created before the world.
Teshuvah is the power to meet the truth. It is the power to face the pain of the break and the cracks within ourselves, and to repair them.
There was a rupture and repair that happened in the month of Elul many many years ago. The first Luchos were shattered after the Chet HaEgel. The trust between Hashem and Klal Yisrael appeared to have broken. Yet Hashem did not discard the relationship. He told Moshe, “פְּסָל לְךָ שְׁנֵי לֻחֹת אֲבָנִים כָּרִאשֹׁנִים”—carve for yourself a second set of Luchos.
In fact, the Midrash (Shemos Rabbah 46:1) teaches that the second luchos contained even more Torah than the first. The relationship that blossomed from rupture held a depth that had not been present before it. Moshe Rabbeinu was distressed that the luchos were broken. Hashem told him:
אַל תִּצְטָעֵר בַּלּוּחוֹת הָרִאשׁוֹנוֹת, שֶׁלֹּא הָיוּ אֶלָּא עֲשֶׂרֶת הַדִּבְּרוֹת בִּלְבַד; וּבַלּוּחוֹת הַשְּׁנִיִּים אֲנִי נוֹתֵן לְךָ שֶׁיְּהֵא בָּהֶם הֲלָכוֹת, מִדְרָשׁ וְאַגָּדוֹת
Do not be distressed over the first Luchos, which contained only the Ten Commandments. With the second Luchos, I will give you halachos, Midrash, and Aggadah.
The second luchos were created invested with the power of Torah S'bal Peh, because that is the relationship between HKBH and Klal Yisrael. When there is a repair, the relationship includes so much more.
Welcome to incredible month of Elul, the month of Rupture and Repair. The month Hashem invites us to bring all our broken parts back to Him and to create the repair together. In our hearts, in our relationships, in our connection with Him.
Wishing you a beautiful and meaningful Chodesh Elul,
כתיבה וחתיחמה טובה!
Yocheved
Let's Write!
We're first going to focus on all three categories, making three lists.
A. Which parts of yourself feel broken about your relationship with yourself?
B. Which parts feel broken about your relationships with others?
C. Which parts feel broken about your relationship with Hashem? Create a list of 7-10 parts, feelings, beliefs, etc in each.
Look through all thee lists and find one word that is the same in all three. (You'll probably have more than one word, but choose the one that feels most agitated, intense of painful.)
That is the greatest rupture you feel right now. It is the rupture that flows across all the areas of your life. That is the one you want to heal this Elul.
Ask yourself what the polar opposite of that brokenness is, and how you can integrate that into all three areas of your life?
Skim it all over and write a reflection in the form of a letter to Hashem. Write Him about all your broken parts, share your pain with Him, and be real. And ask Him to help you repair the rupture, there is no one that can fix a system like the One who created it.
CHOOSE YOUR ROUTE
The Guided Route
Know Your Destination: The Waze and the Ways
A live three-week course as we explore the questions that matter most before the Yamim Noraim. Through Torah sources, reflective writing, and meaningful conversation, we'll clarify where we are, where we long to be, and the small, intentional, and practical steps that can start to bridge that distance.
Tuesday 1:30pm EST
Begins August 25
The Scenic Route
Write Your Way Through Elul
A 30-day guided journal with thought-provoking prompts centered on teshuvah, tefillah, and tzedakah, designed to help you ponder, reflect, and create a meaningful direction for yourself throughout the month of Elul.
The 5-minute Route
Write Now!
Formerly available as a card deck and now reimagined as a convenient e-book, Write Now! offers short, powerful writing prompts related to Teshuva that help you reconnect with yourself wherever you are and however full your day may be. Perfect for moments of reflection all year round, this e-book is especially meaningful in the month of Elul.
Note: In EY the original card deck is still on sale. See below.
LIVING IN ERETZ YISRAEL?
For those living in Eretz Yisrael, the Elul Journal and the original Write Now! Card Deck, along with all other WYWH products, can be purchased in Yerushalayim, at Minchas Yitzchak 6, first floor, 24 hours a day.
This Elul, don't just make the journey on autopilot.
The menus will get planned.
The clothing will get bought.
The guests will come.
The meals will be served.
But ...where will you be?
Travel with intention.
I’d love to have you join me.
Warmly,
Yocheved